Thursday, March 10, 2011

Not again!

So.. Was let go yesterday:(  I cant even put into words right now how sad and mad I feel at he same time. At the end of the day one of my bosses asked me into his office and pulled out 2 checks( I knew what that meant) I could feel the tears coming but I held them in. He gave me all these bs excuses why he didn't need me anymore.  I knew in my head that he was lying. I'm not sure what the real reason was because I was there every day on time, did all my work, stayed overtime, helped other departments. I feel like its something PERSONAL, and that's what makes me feel worse. At least If i knew it was my job performance but now its me! I keep thinking in my head.. What is wrong with me?

I wouldn't really mingle with my work collies. They just weren't people I wanted to hang with. I would go to lunch alone and only people I would really talk to were the people in the transportation dept. All they would do is cuss, say nasty jokes, and on  many ocassions talk crap about eachother and I didnt wanna be around that.  I don't mind a nasty joke but in my opinion it has to be in a different place. On Wed night I lost all respect for my bosses. I stayed overtime and my bosses are husband & wife. When Iwas hired I knew this might be a problem. They started arguing (in front of me) yelling "FUCK you" over and over again and she said she quit and stormed off.. Crazyyy!!! You know makes me more mad??? Is they let me go after their busiest day of the week. They made me do all this work, and even learn new stuff to help this girl and then he let me go. What an ASSHOLE! As soon as I left I called J and that's when I let everything out. I couldn't stop crying, and it was the kind of crying where you cant breathe:( He told me to go to his house and his bro would open the door for me cause he was on his way from work. I then called my mom, dad, and sis. They all told me its OK and something better will come. They all knew I didn't care for my job much , but It was a job. I was getting paid, doing something with my life besides watch TV all day! I'm happy I have supporting people around me, and I have to have the faith that something better will come, but its really hard right now. When I went to bed last night and was saying my prayer I started asking God why? what did I do? Then I felt bad for thinking that and questioning him. He has his reasons and I have to believe in him. This blogging make me feel better in a way kind of like my diary so sorry if its boring. I know my grammar isn't right sometimes, but just me venting. So as of today, I'm on the hunt again. Wish me luck!! Thanks for reading.

10 comments:

  1. Ah Jen I kinda just wanna give you a hug right now! :( YOu have such a nice outlook on this, of course that is NOT fun getting let go. And after awhile it I'm sure gets emotionally draining on you. But the important thing like you said is to stay focussed. Don't give up, trust God & have faith that better is out there. Make a list of all the things you want to do, like "30 before 30" Maybe in the interim of trying to find full time employment you can tackle your list. Like take a self defense class, or a cooking class, some fun hike somewhere, learn how to sew. I am just throwing ideas out there...also I think you know your long term goals & I think you're well on your way to them (like wife & Mommy) so in the meantime if it's job to job hey least it's a paycheck to get you through. I loathe my job, but it's not what I want to do for my life...my long term goals include taking my kids to school and planning dinners lol...NOT invoices...but it is what it is now.
    I'll be thinking bout ya I'm sure everything is going to work out fine & I'll keep my eyes & ears out for you.
    XOXO

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  2. Thank you Erika for the kind comment. You made me cry. Im just very emotional right now, I think cause aunt flow is a comin lol. For me it is about just the $. Ive never been excited to work I just know I have to. Cooking class sounds good , God knows I need it :) Thanks again:)

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  3. Aww Jenn I'm so sorry! I know how you feel.. I was let go from a company, and looked for work for over a year.. My job now just kinda fell in my lap.. It's not a job I wish to be at forever, but I'm making good money, and get to tan for free.. lol.. Everything happens for a reason, and this too shall pass!

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  4. I'm so sorry Jenn! I couldn't imagine what that feels like at all. You are much better off finding something else, especially with the work environment you were in. It was not healthy at all! I am sure you are a terrific worker and the right job will come your way. Keep with your positive attitude it will pay off in the end. ;)

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  5. Awww man, this just plain stinks! So sorry to hear about this :( Sounds like it was for the best though. I don't know about you but after that lil incident I'd be looking for other employment. In my experience working for small companies isn't all that pleasant at times. Maybe some larger with a more professional atmosphere would suit you better? Like they always say - everything happens for a reason! Keep your chin up girlie! Xo

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  6. Aww Jenn I'm so sorry! I'm sure you were great there- sounds like they just have some drama goin' on, prob better that you don't have to deal with that anymore. Stay positive, I'm sure something else will come along- just a season and some are crappy but they don't last forever. Job search + sucky economy is tough- it's not you. Keep pluggin' girl there's a job out there for you! :(

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  7. Thnaks guys for all the kind words! I really appreciate it:)

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  8. Wow Jenn that company sounds like a BS company and who wants to work somewhere with all the negative energy?? You are such a light don't let them bring you down. Buena suerte chica, something else will come.

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  9. Sorry girl! Keep your head up ... you don't need to be in that work environment anyway, you are a good person & deserve the job of your dreams. Good luck w/ the job search ... You will find something perfect for you. =)

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  10. I'm sorry Jenn!! Don't beat urself up about it... after all that negativity you're better off and something new will come that you'll fit right into :)

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